{"id":3634,"date":"1965-04-01T01:00:00","date_gmt":"1965-04-01T01:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.rbc.com\/en\/about-us\/history\/letter\/april-1965-vol-46-no-4-making-the-most-of-your-life\/"},"modified":"2022-11-28T01:25:14","modified_gmt":"2022-11-28T01:25:14","slug":"april-1965-vol-46-no-4-making-the-most-of-your-life","status":"publish","type":"rbc_letter","link":"https:\/\/www.rbc.com\/en\/about-us\/history\/letter\/april-1965-vol-46-no-4-making-the-most-of-your-life\/","title":{"rendered":"April 1965 &#8211; Vol. 46, No. 4 &#8211; Making the Most of Your Life"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"layout-column-main\">\n<p class=\"boldtext\"> There is no easy way to make the most of                     your life. Even if you follow the Hedonists in believing that                     pleasure is the only good, you have to do some work to make                     the pleasure possible.<\/p>\n<p>The Canadian way of life has as one of its principles the                     fact of work. One is expected to contribute economically,                     socially and culturally.<\/p>\n<p>Having mastered the daily routine of living within this                     pattern, then we add grace notes and go on to fill our lives                     with personally rewarding projects. These may be in any of                     six areas: aesthetic, economic, political, social, religious                     and philosophical. Some persons are successful in linking                     three or four in their satisfying lives.<\/p>\n<p>Of what does a full life consist? First of all, it requires                     that you be awake and active. It requires that you stretch                     your mind muscles so as to grasp and comprehend much that                     will not force itself upon you. It requires that you see and                     appreciate beauty. It requires you to stand on your own feet,                     measuring up to life&#8217;s demands, while at the same time you                     bow in awe of life&#8217;s unexplained mysteries. This adds up to                     seeing life steadily and seeing it whole.<\/p>\n<p>Obviously then, there is more to making the most of your                     life than learning the plod and punctuality books by heart.                     You need to absorb their precepts into your own individuality,                     tailored to your environment and your purpose in life.<\/p>\n<p>Here is where mottoes and slogans, auto-suggestion                     and the association of ideas, principles and standards, come                     in handy. This <em>Letter <\/em>is an attempt to pull together                     some of the precepts in capsule form.<\/p>\n<p>As you progress from youth to adulthood you will learn to                     adjust yourself to the circumstances of your new life so that                     you fit into the total situation. Insofar as you adapt yourself                     intelligently, you are master of your fate.<\/p>\n<p>The time has come to grow up, and growing up consists in                     the main of bringing random impulses under control and co-ordinating                     hit-or-miss activities. The mature world, whether                     business, professional or technical, has no use for youths                     who enter it glorifying infantilism&nbsp;&#8230; like a small                     child crying &#8220;look at me!&#8221; as he jumps off a six-inch                     high step.<\/p>\n<p>Do not be afraid of getting wrinkles on your face in the                     process of developing maturity. There is nothing less interesting                     than a face on which life has written no story. In the ruins                     of Pompeii the visitor sees a wall painting of Narcissus,                     the young man who was so enamoured of himself that he could                     not tear himself away from a pool that reflected his good                     looks. He had thrown away his past, he ignored what was going                     on around him, and he gave no thought to the future. A myth-maker                     tells us that when Narcissus came to the end, and was being                     ferried over the River Styx, the River of Death, he passed                     the time gazing over the side of the boat at his reflection.<\/p>\n<p>One needs a sense of proportion, and to learn to command                     the self one has to live with. Mind-set, whether on self-gratification                     or some other love, is a state that prevents your making the                     most of your life.<\/p>\n<h3>About being ambitious<\/h3>\n<p>When you are seeking personal fulfilment, that is true ambition.                     You take into account your talent, your tastes and your hopes,                     the demands of the business or professional or scientific                     career you want, and you move toward perfecting your ability                     to meet them. It is remarkable what may be accomplished by                     plain, homespun capacities governed by an indomitable purpose                     and common sense.<\/p>\n<p>What is your real, chief and foremost object in life? The                     vocation you choose will colour your relations with the world.                     The act of choosing will give you a miniature plan to stimulate                     and rouse you, to urge you on to desirable action, and to                     keep you from false paths.<\/p>\n<p>Self-fulfilment does not always mean reaching a lofty                     height of perfection. The perfection of a tree on a rocky                     hillside is judged by this: in its environment of soil and                     climate and molestation by men and animals, it has done all                     that could be expected of it. The tree may be poverty-stricken,                     hunger-pinched, tempest-tortured, and stripped of                     bark, not at all an ideal tree of its species, but it has                     prevailed in being the best tree possible under the circumstances.<\/p>\n<p>Ambition to succeed must take account of two things as you                     enter the world market-place: what have you to offer,                     and what are you prepared to do to improve the quality of                     what you offer? During the next thirty years you will sell                     about seventy thousand hours of your time and energy. What                     you get for it depends upon a constructive and determined                     answer to these questions.<\/p>\n<p>How constructive are you? Instead of urging their imagination                     to produce a high and attainable goal, some people are content                     to struggle and whine through their days with a dull resentment                     of what they call their &#8220;bad breaks&#8221;. They are the sort of                     people who, about to be cast away on a desert island, would                     select a packing-case full of light novels and cartoon                     books to keep them company. The constructive person would                     ask for some blank notebooks and a supply of pencils.<\/p>\n<h3>The best in life<\/h3>\n<p>A perceptive person discriminates between what the herd                     approves and what he himself has set his mind upon as being                     valuable. To such a person most of the pleasures which are                     run after by mankind are superfluous, or even a trouble and                     a burden.<\/p>\n<p>Discrimination means to prefer the best. It takes account                     of what may be, rather than what is. It looks for possibilities.                     It has learned to scorn mediocrity and things that are shoddy                     by becoming acquainted with the best. This is easy to do.                     Whether your interest is in poetry, science or business, there                     is available to you the opportunity to make yourself familiar                     with the first-rate of all time.<\/p>\n<p>Everything else in your life is relative to the thing you                     choose as your measure of success, so let it be nothing small.<\/p>\n<p>When you are striving for money, position, or power, you                     have many competitors, but when you are developing your own                     personality so as to get the most out of life you have no                     outside competition. The chief good you seek is something                     which is your own, not easily taken from you.<\/p>\n<p>We can add very much to our happiness, said a great German                     philosopher, by a timely recognition of the simple truth that                     every man&#8217;s chief and real existence is in his own skin and                     not in other people&#8217;s opinions. We need the courage to be                     what we are, and to follow the course we have mapped out.<\/p>\n<p>All of this presupposes activity of thought. This is different                     from gathering scraps of fact or amassing technical detail.                     It implies the possession of an ideal against which to measure                     critically the value of things.<\/p>\n<p>A good question to ask once in a while is this: &#8220;How close                     am I to what I should expect to be at this stage?&#8221; It brings                     your thinking to a point. It reminds you that though there                     is no reason why every man cannot grasp all the happiness                     of which he is capable, he has to keep reaching.<\/p>\n<h3>The search for happiness<\/h3>\n<p>Happiness is an individual thing, made up of work, interests,                     friendships, the pursuit of an ideal, and health.<\/p>\n<p>A man does not have to go around oozing cheerfulness in                     order to be a happy man. He may be happy in depth, and that                     sort of happiness, in the words of Robert Frost, the United                     States poet, &#8220;Will bear some keeping still about.&#8221; He is enjoying                     durable satisfactions.<\/p>\n<p>To get the most out of life we need to do our best work,                     participate in the best sort of leisure activity, and solve                     our problems in the best way. &#8220;Best&#8221; in this context means                     the highest for which our talents equip us. It means more                     what we put into life than what we loot out of life.<\/p>\n<p>A rich full life cannot be described in terms of money,                     power and prestige. It cannot be defined as winning notoriety,                     for glory is only an impassioned name for what is merely our                     itch to hear ourselves spoken of. John Ruskin, the nineteenth                     century essayist and lecturer, insisted that to live a full                     life we must have five qualities similar to those required                     in good architecture: Unity, the type of divine comprehensiveness;                     Repose, the type of divine permanence; Symmetry, the type                     of divine justice; Moderation, the type of government by law,                     and Infinity, the type of divine incomprehensibility.<\/p>\n<p>There is no place for make-believe in such a life.                     You are not living through the day to please others or to                     put on a good show, but to meet your critical self at nightfall.                     That self takes little account of what the people around you                     during the day said about you. They are incompetent to judge                     your compulsions and your purposes, and if your standards                     are high you need pay no heed to their finicky criticisms.<\/p>\n<p>One thing needed is to avoid the habit of mind in which                     a man is forever looking for something against which to defend                     himself, and to face your future with a positive spirit and                     a confident posture. You must step resolutely from the cloistered                     life of home and school into the hurly-burly of the working                     world. Having given your best thought to where the step will                     lead you, stride out boldly. When Caesar, with a small force                     of horse and foot, reached the banks of the River Rubicon,                     he halted to consider the greatness of his enterprise. Then,                     having weighed the difficulties against the gains, he said                     to his staff: &#8220;Let the die be cast&#8221;, and led his army across                     the Rubicon to become master of Rome.<\/p>\n<h3>What is character?<\/h3>\n<p>All the precepts looked at so far contribute to the building                     of character. A person of character is one who hates cruelty,                     despises softness, and detests those who climb on the shoulders                     of others. He recognizes the dignity of duty, fairness, sympathy,                     co-operation, and all the other things that make a decent                     society possible. He has taste, which is the instinctive and                     instant preferring of one material object to another without                     any obvious reason.<\/p>\n<p>These are essential to making the most of life. They imply                     development of the whole man and the harmonizing of all his                     parts.<\/p>\n<p>To live a full life you need to score heavily on interests,                     tapping your energies and your store of qualities through                     a great variety of outlets. A person who is not wise enough                     to seek diversity of interests leads a monotonous and thin                     life, and is subject to the evils of satiety and boredom.<\/p>\n<p>Look around at people who are laggards in business: are                     they not people who have buried themselves in their immediate                     occupations? They never give a thought to what they need to                     know or do so as to ready themselves for the next stage of                     advancement. They see facts singly or in twos or threes, but                     their sight becomes blurred and dim when they try to grasp                     in their rough proportions all the multitude of facts that                     compose a future situation.<\/p>\n<p>If you are &#8220;well-rounded&#8221; everything you do will be                     done with enthusiasm, a sense of values, imaginative thinking,                     and self-confidence.<\/p>\n<p>Without enthusiasm you are living only half a life, merely                     &#8220;getting by&#8221;. This most dynamic of human qualities can be                     pictured as the ideal descended on earth to battle with realities.                     It is the whole-heartedness that carries you through                     difficult tasks and routine activities.<\/p>\n<p>Another word for it is &#8220;zest&#8221;, defined by the dictionary                     as &#8220;gusto, something that gives a relish&#8221;. Having zest means                     that you are so eager about living that you can hardly wait                     for morning to get started again. It makes life perpetually                     fascinating.<\/p>\n<p>Should one of your enthusiasms run into an immovable barrier,                     call your sense of values to your aid. Here is a chance to                     test your standards, to put first things first, to give up                     the lesser good in favour of the greater good. So long as                     you have not lost the something in your life which is vital                     to you, continue with your usual zest to do the important                     things.<\/p>\n<h3>Use your imagination<\/h3>\n<p>Imaginative thinking is necessary if you are not to be merely                     a plodder, but you must be able to dream without making dreams                     your master. Imagination is not a sedative to deaden life,                     but a force toward a more abundant life. It is the mind&#8217;s                     ability to recall past experiences and relate them to new                     situations in combinations of infinite variety.<\/p>\n<p>Your imagination needs limbering up once in a while. It                     cannot be ignored for long periods and then called upon in                     some crisis. The difference between on-going and routine                     men is simply this: the successful people have kept their                     imaginations at work. The flash of inspiration is important,                     without doubt, but the certainty that it will occur can be                     increased by enlarging the stock of ideas in your mind upon                     which imagination has a chance to work. The bright idea, the                     brain-storm, will come if you have been alert in observing,                     persevering in examining, and constructive in thinking, looking                     expectantly for a link between something present and something                     not yet thought of.<\/p>\n<p>Hold your mind&#8217;s door open to new ideas, all kinds of them.                     When a new idea enters, it may seem timid and rough hewn,                     it needs to be encouraged and to have its jagged edges smoothed.                     It may be only a small idea, but don&#8217;t despise it. Look back                     over the past year and you will find that your truly significant                     ideas started in a small way, perhaps just as some new slant                     on something already in your mind.<\/p>\n<p>The highest, most varied and most lasting pleasures are                     those of the intellect, toying with ideas and building them                     into new forms such as no one has seen before.<\/p>\n<p>It is said that people who give free scope to this sort                     of creativity are not conformists, but their difference from                     other people lies in the realm of the mind and not necessarily                     of outward appearance. If a man seems out of step with his                     fellows it may be because, as the social rebel Henry David                     Thoreau said, &#8220;he hears a different drummer. Let him step                     to the music which he hears, however measured or far away.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>This is quite different from indulging in extravagances                     of appearance or behaviour thought up in some joyous hour.                     Being strange in your manner or clothes may make you distinguished,                     but distinguished for what? To cultivate idiosyncrasies may                     give the impression that you are striving to convey something.                     Why not strive to <em>be <\/em>something?<\/p>\n<p>Instead of working to increase their individual knowledge                     and understanding so as to make the most of their lives, some                     young people attend congresses and parades where they find                     fault with the lack of attention they are accorded. How can                     self-indulgence, self-preoccupation and exhibitionism                     contribute to a full life?<\/p>\n<p>This kind of behaviour is far removed from the self-confidence                     of the constructive seeker after goodness in life. He knows                     the difficulties but does not shrink from them; he is not                     one who leans on others; he is not afraid to face facts; he                     is not one who has to be pampered at every turn. Our happiness                     in our endeavour to make the most of our lives depends on                     what we back ourselves to be and do.<\/p>\n<h3>On making friends<\/h3>\n<p>Be fastidious in adopting new modes and new friends. They                     must fit your personality and your ambition.<\/p>\n<p>Everyone needs friends. Joy is empty unless it is shared                     with someone. Success is valueless unless friends participate                     in it. The friendless man recalls the plight of the grand                     army of Napoleon entering Moscow for the first time, entering                     a capital, they found none but themselves to be witnesses                     of their glory.<\/p>\n<p>The company you keep should be no less worthy than yourself.                     It should be made up of people who make you feel the roominess                     of life. Even if you feel more at ease with third-raters,                     you must not repose there: people of a higher intellectual                     order must be your companions if you are to fulfil your potentiality.<\/p>\n<p>This is not to say that you must be a climber, a detestable                     sort of person, but you need to protect your good name and                     your future against the disrepute of bad or inferior company.                     And when you have made friends of whose affection and devotion                     you can be sure, take Shakespeare&#8217;s advice to heart: &#8220;Grapple                     them to thy soul with hoops of steel.&#8221;<\/p>\n<h3>The strenuous life<\/h3>\n<p>The person in search of a satisfying life does not ask for                     comfort, but for an opportunity to exercise his abilities.                     Not everyone is born with a longing for strenuous discomfort                     in remote places, but everyone who is trying to accomplish                     something knows that you cannot make the most of your life                     if you try to exist as a non-participating unit in the                     life around you.<\/p>\n<p>Indolence is a distressing state. We must be doing something                     to be happy. Effort and struggle with difficulties are as                     natural to a man as grubbing in the ground is to a gopher.                     To have all his wants gratified is intolerable. It is a denial                     of the abundant life.<\/p>\n<p>We recall the address by Theodore Roosevelt in the closing                     year of the nineteenth century. It was called &#8220;The Strenuous                     Life&#8221;, and even then, when the affluent century had not yet                     dawned, it was derided. Now, after sixty years, it seems to                     thoughtful people that a return is needed to Roosevelt&#8217;s principles                     if we are to make life rewarding. A life of ease, lived by                     those who are slow in thought and sluggish in action, is shabby                     and worthless.<\/p>\n<p>Roosevelt summed up his principles in this way: &#8220;I wish                     to preach not the doctrine of ignoble ease but the doctrine                     of the strenuous life; the life of toil and effort; of labour                     and strife; to preach that highest form of success which comes                     not to the man who desires mere easy peace but to the man                     who does not shrink from danger, from hardship, or from bitter                     toil, and who out of these wins the splendid ultimate triumph.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Absorption in ease or passing pleasure is one of the most                     common signs of present or impending decay. There is a phrase:                     &#8220;To rest on your laurels&#8221;, meaning to quit trying after winning                     a crown or a gold medal or a promotion. A prize does nothing                     else but reward past achievement. To abandon ambition upon                     reaching a plateau is to suffer diminution of our essential                     manhood.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Comfort,&#8221; said Kahlil Gibran, the Lebanese poet, &#8220;is a                     stealthy thing that enters the house as a guest, and then                     becomes a host, and then a master.&#8221; We should be alert to                     unmask its nature before we learn to love it too greatly.<\/p>\n<h3>Don&#8217;t sit down too soon<\/h3>\n<p>The problems accompanying success are more agreeable than                     those contingent upon failure, but they are no less challenging.                     To handle any sort of problem successfully, we need to weigh                     possibilities, discard details that are irrelevant, divine                     the general rules according to which events occur, and test                     our decision by experiment.<\/p>\n<p>You can&#8217;t treat all facts as being of equal value. Some                     have validity in your circumstances, and some have not. The                     problem must be tidied up and its dimensions learned. Get                     inside it and feel its contours. This approach avoids rushing                     toward an answer and then retracing your steps to check. By                     working more deliberately, marshalling facts and resources,                     you move with an air of certainty.<\/p>\n<p>Do not be easily discouraged in your search for a satisfying                     life. Some people sit down too soon. They remind us of the                     Lotus Eaters, people told about in Homer&#8217;s <em>Odyssey<\/em>,                     who lay lazily on their beach eating a fruit which caused                     them to lose all interest in work and all desire to reach                     their native country. The worst thing in life is not to fail,                     but not to try to succeed; to live in the gray twilight that                     knows neither brightness nor shadow, neither victory nor defeat.<\/p>\n<p>You may not always be able to play the game gleefully; you                     may, indeed, be glad to think sometimes that because an unhappiness                     has not befallen you that is your happiness. Like Robert Louis                     Stevenson, writer of remarkable poetry and still-living                     prose, you may rise above self-pity. He was so frail                     in health that he had to leave the home he loved and go into                     far countries: and he wrote an essay called &#8220;On the Enjoyment                     of Unpleasant Places&#8221;.<\/p>\n<p>Let your preparations for making the most of your life be                     suitable to your hopes and the greatness of your enterprise.                     Of this be sure, there is no free pass that will admit you                     to a full life. But if the effort you make appears to be tedious                     or irksome, recall your purpose and your quest, then the vexations                     of daily life will seem trivial.<\/p>\n<p>These are some parts of a well-rounded life, but so                     dismembered life loses its attractiveness and its joy. You                     will not find your desired life in shrivelled abstractness                     and formally stated precepts, but you will find it clothed                     in the living form of your own personality when all these                     principles are made part of you.<\/p>\n<p>Then, every day, you can look forward to tomorrow with calmness                     and anticipation, because you have lived fully today.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"author":79,"featured_media":0,"template":"","categories":[1],"rbc_letter_theme":[],"rbc_letter_year":[45],"class_list":["post-3634","rbc_letter","type-rbc_letter","status-publish","hentry","category-uncategorized","rbc_letter_year-45"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v27.2 (Yoast SEO v27.2) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>April 1965 - Vol. 46, No. 4 - Making the Most of Your Life - RBC<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.rbc.com\/en\/about-us\/history\/letter\/april-1965-vol-46-no-4-making-the-most-of-your-life\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"April 1965 - Vol. 46, No. 4 - Making the Most of Your Life - RBC\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"There is no easy way to make the most of your life. 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Even if you follow the Hedonists in believing that pleasure is the only good, you have to do some work to make the pleasure possible. The Canadian way of life has as one of its principles the fact of work. 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